NEW TITLES
Immortal
"Several decades ago
some jokey New York writer types
got together to create
a very bad book.
Each writer contributed a chapter.
Some chapters were returned
because they were 'too good.'
Is that what we have here?"

Cairo Taxi
"The author tells us
that there are 80,000 taxis
on the streets of Cairo and
the figure seems a little exaggerated
until you live there for a week with
the noise, smog, and
minute-by-minute wrecks."

The World on Fire
"He said of the many
Russians in the United States,
'Out of the sly and crafty eyes of
many of them leap cupidity,
cruelty, insanity, and crime.
From their lopsided faces,
sloping brows, and misshapen features
may be recognized
the unmistakable
criminal type.'"

My Mother Wears Combat Boots
"If I were going to
have another baby god forbid
this book would be my constant companion.
Even if you decide not to go
into the zygote business,
the startlingly honest fact-finding and
well-researched opinions
make it worth your study."

When Huai Flowers Bloom
"Since he did not die,
he was assumed to have
magic chi in his body;
'some even conjectured that
I might be a reincarnation
of a spirit.' Thus
he was not imprisoned."

The Associates
"The rate was $6 a ton:
$4 went to the ship owner
to take the iron all
the way across the Pacific,
and $2 to the Southern Pacific
for the haulage by rail from
San Pedro to Los Angeles.
'Ah!' said the Chinese merchant.
'Los Angeles must be far inland.'"

The Accidental Explorer
"Fear binds me to this landscape,
fear at what I might find or lose,
fear of what might find or lose me
out here where everything seems
familiar and foreign, all at once.
Alaska is big enough to cradle
every true fear and hope
we can bear."

Great Reviews of the Past
Dangerous Travel Guide
"In Zaire, if you are stopped
by the police for whatever reason,
you will be considered a necessary part
of the foreign economic investment
in their country ... If you are waylaid
by a real criminal
don't bother reporting it."

BRIEF REVIEWS
Dragon Thunder
My Life with Chögyam Trungpa
Red Parrot, Wooden Leg
Natural Shocks

LETTERS
William Faulkner
Flags in the Dust

MORE LETTERS
Dugustus Goop
X. J. Kennedy
Bush Hog

EVEN MORE LETTERS
Cryptic Letters of the Month
Think You
Czechoslovakian Recipes

YET EVEN MORE LETTERS
And More Cryptic Letters of the Month
Love Letters
Abortions

ARTICLES
Great Articles from the Past
Lifestyles of the Blind and Paralyzed:
"The pay is lousy,
no vacations or sick leave,
and the compliments...
You'd rather do without them.
On the plus side,
you're exempt from military service,
get to watch lots of TV
and pay half price at the movies."

READINGS
Leadbelly and John Lomax
"Lomax's posture toward journalists ---
who were not allowed to address Leadbelly directly,
lest they interfere with his purity ---
smacked of the antics of P. T. Barnum.
He had set Leadbelly up as a savage curiosity,
a kind of homegrown Wild Man of Borneo."

The Funeral of Nikolai Vorontsov
"The intellectuals in this room
had thought that democracy would
provide them with their hour,
the moment when
their opinions would count.
Instead the nation, acting
democratically, had gone in
a different direction."

POETRY
Brooklyn College Brain
"Hello Professor Ginsberg have some coffee,
have some students, have some office hours
Tuesdays & Thursdays, have a couple subway tokens
in advance, have a box in the English Department,
have a look at Miss Sylvia Blitzer behind the typewriter
Have some poems er maybe they're not so bad have a
good time workshopping Bodhicitta in the Bird Room."

Riding the D-Train
"Everything is important:
that thin girl, for instance,
in flowered dress, golden high heels.
How did her eyes get scarred?
Why is that old man crying?
Why does that woman carry
a cat in her pocketbook?"

THE OFFICIAL RALPH
Paradox-of-the-Month

GENERAL INDEX
All the back-issues of RALPH,
including titles of books under review,
along with author, subject, and publisher,
plus links to readings, articles, and poems
that have appeared on-line
since 1994.

A PITHY SAMPLE
of our most notorious reviews
as collected in the hard-copy
"FOLIO"

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