The Review of Arts, Literature,
Philosophy and the Humanities

  Number 172

Spring 2008

Foreskin's Lament
"The only place more non-kosher
than McDonald's was Red Lobster,
but I didn't need God to tell me
not to eat things with antennas.
Red Lobster seemed like the place
God made you eat as punishment for
eating non-kosher in the first place."

Song of Kahunsha
"Fear made me forget
that I have polio and
I am unable to run so
this man caught me easily and
slashed my face with a knife.
'I am Anand Bhai, and
your father owed me money,
so you must work for me.'"

Life Class
"Finally, there's the matter of
le baiser langoureux.
The artist Kit Neville may be fleshy,
soft, and ungainly, but
he has a muscular tongue that
he uses with the force of
an Oxbridge oarsman
heading up the Thames."

When You Catch an Adjective, Kill It
"The English favor
collective or purely regional
sports team names,
while we have
the New York Yankees,
the Los Angeles Angels
which when you translate
the Spanish becomes
the the Angels Angels."

Cancel your Own Goddam Subscription
"A young man,
voice breaking with emotion
asked one simple question:
'Mr. Buckley .... have you
ever gone hungry?'
Buckley responded
'Why, yes, my yacht
experienced an
unfortunate shortage of
stuffed goose recently
between Nassau and the Bahamas.'"

Journey to the East
"He was an
economizer, a fixer.
The first thing
he fixed was his name.
He started out as
Charles-Édouard Jeanneret
but shortened it to Le Corbusier."

Great Reviews of the Past
21 Variations on a Theme
"We combed through
the early years of RALPH
to find what we considered
the best reviews (and stories
and poems) of our lives.
Here are twenty-one
that we loved beyond
all reason."

John D. MacArthur
Eccentric Billionaire
Bill Mauldin:
A Life Up Front
Jan de Hartog:
A View of the Ocean

The "Weeping Frenchman:"
The Ethics of News Photographers

Pekin Ducks
Ezra Pound
Poems of Brooklyn

The Barnes Foundation
World War One and Gas

Cryptic Letters of the Month
Onanism and
The Importance of Time

In Praise of the One-Holer
"It was obvious
from the beginning that,
without running water
our more earthy needs would
have to be satisfied by
what the English have come to call
'the jakes.'"

The Death of the Moth
"He once wanted to
show people how death operated,
and he did so by using
a Christian military commander
whose name has been preserved:
he was called Avram Brankovich,
and he fought in Walachia,
where, Satan claimed,
every man is born a poet,
lives like a thief,
and dies a vampire."

Gertrude Stein and Grammar
"Periods have a life of their own
a necessity of their own
a feeling of their own
a time of their own.
And that feeling that life
that necessity that time
can express itself in
an infinite variety that is
the reason I have always remained
true to periods."

Great Poems from the Past
Song of Welcome
"Here are your pills on the plastic tray,
Your disappointing, crisp X-ray.
You are welcome to pray.
Here's your cemetery, a well kept glen.
Welcome to a voice that says, 'Amen.'
The end of the rope, old man.
Here's your will, and here's a few
takers. Here's an empty pew.
Here's life after you."

In Memory of the Horse David,
Who Ate One of My Poems


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along with author, subject, and publisher,
plus links to readings, articles, and poems
that have appeared on-line
since 1994.

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Submitting Reviews
Suggestions for would-be reviewers --- and payment schedule.
RALPH didn't spring full-blown from the brows of the gods:
     We've been around (in different guises) for over thirty years.     
The Fessenden Fund
Describing the good works of RALPH's official godparent
Behind the Scenes

The Faces of Those Who Make Up the Face of RALPH
Copyright Notice
The Reginald A. Fessenden Educational Fund, Inc.

Lolita Lark, Editor-In-Chief
Post Office Box 16719
San Diego CA 92176

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