Poison in Lome Togo
Greetings From, Miss Lea Bahati.

With all due respect, I want you to read my letter with one mind and help me. I am The only daughter of late Mr.and Mrs Bahati. My Late father was a very wealthy cocoa dealer in Lome Togo before he was poisoned to death by his business associates on one of their outing to discuss on a business deal. my mother died when she was given birth to me, since then my father took me so special because I am motherless. Before the death of my father on 2nd January 2014 in a private hospital here in Lome Togo. He secretly called me on his bedside and told me that he has a sum of USD5,000,000.00 United States dollars left in a fixed deposit account in a local bank here in Lome Togo, that he used my name as his only daughter for the next of kin in deposit of the fund. He also explained to me that it was because of this wealth that he was poisoned by his business associates that I should seek for a foreign partner in a country of my choice where I will transfer this money and use it for investment purpose, such as real estate agent,

I am 18 year old. Dear I am honorably seeking your assistance in the following ways . . .

--- Miss.Lea bahati

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Hi, Lea,

We did read your letter (as you ask) "with one mind" even though there are several of us crowded in here and we must gratefully ask you to allow us to take a while in considering helping you with this wonderful offer of "USD5,000,000.00 United States dollars." We discussed the pros and cons of all this bread with our family of dodderers thinking of the things we need at this time of life like "medicine" (when you get to this time of life if you are not poisoned before then you will begin to catch my drift). We thought of all the things we can do with five million smackers like helping the poor there in Lomo Togo and we have decided that because your father was poisoned by his business associates, we are wondering what is to happen to us when we get this stash of moolah. We are not too sure where Lome Togo is, but we'd bet a cookie that a couple of well-trained poisoners from there could find us readily at our wretched digs here in Paradise Valley and stuff some arsenic (or whatever is in vogue now as a people popper-offer) in our martinis (for lunch) or our margaritas (for dinner) or even our Cherri-Pops (for breakfast) if they a had a mind to so do so. We mean, if they were able to assassinate someone as respected as your old man, think what they would do to a bunch of old rustics who haven't been able to raise a few bucks for our monthly supply of Depends much less our weekly trip downtown to Lurid Ladies Inc. Since even at this time of life we still value our lives above all good things even five million smackers and even on top of that your giving us a chance to meet a brave if not feisty 18-year-old young lady like yourself for companionship (and even perhaps dining and dancing if you care for the daily ministrations of the four or five old duffers who live here), we will have to regretfully decline. I mean, even though most of us are in that time of life where we are being referred to as "seniors" and there doesn't seem to be all that much more tea in the teabag, so to speak, we're better off at this time covering our asses and thus can thank you profoundly and even ask that you tell none of your so-called "friends" or "associates" that you tried to palm off this sticky-wicket on us who are so ill-equipped to handle it.

--- The Gang at RALPH
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