The Huns at the Gates
RALPH Goes Commercial

Subject: Ralph goes Commercial


I received an email from --- Sarah Raymond who wanted to pay me about $35 to put a text ad on a candy page on my web site:

in case you're interested.

I googled her email address and got to the "Ralph Goes Commercial" page. It looks like you did not take her up on her offer.

Did she respond to your email? I'm not sure what to think of this.

Any opinion would be greatly appreciated.

--- marcy
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in question

Dear Ms. Kitty:

As we said in our response to Ms. Raymond, we are not in the ad business --- would probably blow it if we tried.

For instance, one time, many years ago, we were living and working in California, trying to sell commercials on a local radio station.

An agent (the inventor of the "Pet Rock," it turned out) asked us to submit ad copy for a new condomium that had just been built on the outskirts of San Jose.

We went out there, looked at this monster (right out of the "New Brutalism" School of Architecture), and went back to the office and wrote an ad that said that people who were security-conscious might want to think about buying one of the condominiums since the whole was built as a medieval castle with special places on the roof designed for fending off hoardes of Huns by pouring boiling cheese on visitors, and, too, we suspected that they would be putting emplacements for machine-guns as well. Needless to say, Mr. Rock cancelled our contract immediately.

--- L. Lark
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